ceasa的部落格

Dominatrix 

Becoming a Dominatrix 

Anyone that says submission equals weakness doesn’t fully understand. There is nothing more beautiful and amazing than a strong man choosing to spend his life worshiping the woman he submits to, because even on his knees, they are both equals.

Although the woman remains in control it is very important to remember that he and I are still a couple in an intriguing, well thought-out relationship.  In public and private he is still my husband/submissive and I his Dominatrix.  Sexy isn’t it! 

I am the source of his sexual pleasure and if you do not think that will change his feelings you are in denial.  Men love their manhood.  He will adore you, love you in a way that you desire and he will be eager to please you because you are, as I said, the source of his release. He will find, over time, he is happier and that will be because you’re happier. He will love the emotional boost the two of you share.

It has enhanced our social life, our loving relationship, our spiritual life.  Sounds silly doesn’t it, but it is true and we fit well into these roles.

Life goes on as it always has, employment, financial, family issues and decisions are all still there. My dominance does not interfere in other areas though I will find he reacts differently, often positively, as his feelings and emotions change.

We have consciously chosen an erotic direction.  We are wildly open and honest about many things, especially our sexuality.   And we are well versed in what a D/s relationship means. 

When we first started talking about this “experiment”, I was a little versed, and I stood hard on the Chastity thing.  This was absolutely key.  Do I torture him with Chastity, hummmm maybe, but I do Tease him with Chastity.  Over time, we tried many roles, and still rotate through all of them.

Our favorites are:

Dress Up 

You’re a Dominatrix/Hotwife, that means show you are a hot wife!  Ask your partner/hubby/submissive sole how you look. Prance around in your high heel shoes, lingerie, nicely done nails, low cut blouse and tight jeans.  It all says, “I’m putting effort into looking fucking hot for you and my lover!” You husband will be go crazy with your appearance and probably jealous because you are not just doing it for him. 

Chastity is not negotiable  

It prevents him from masturbating. Male masturbation is a filthy habit. It’s addictive, selfish, and disrespectful to women. Chronic masturbation has the effect of substantially diminishing a man’s natural sexual desire for his wife of girlfriend. It unfortunately teaches him that his orgasm is primary, and hers is secondary…

Because he can’t even get an erection without her permission, it instantly changes the dynamics of the relationship…

It keeps his sexual focus and energy on his wife or girlfriend…

It will substantially increase his desire to orally service his wife or girlfriend…

If he’s never been an ass-eater, after having his penis locked up for a few weeks, he will be…

It serves as a constant reminder to him of her authority…

Because it makes his orgasms entirely dependent on her generosity, it positively incentives him to honor her, respect her, and motivates him to please…

It gives him the time and opportunity to substantially improve and perfect his oral skills…

It reinforces the idea that pussy is a precious gift that must be earned, and is to be savored and appreciated on those rare occasions when he does get it…

It teaches him that sexual activity with his wife or girlfriend doesn’t necessarily have anything to do with HIS penis…

It deepens his submission to her, and will cause him to worship the ground she walks on…

It will significantly improve his attitude, and make him more generous, caring, kind, respectful, and loving.

It will help soften his sharper edges of his masculinity and quite possibly expose a more emasculated side of him. It will make him more of a listener than a talker…

It helps prepares him for the eventuality of anal penetration, and getting the strap-on. Because his penis isn’t being sexually stimulated, it has the effect of gradually turning other parts of his body into erogenous zones, particularly his anus and his prostate. With patience and persistence, he can be trained to orgasm from stimulation in that region via your finger, or the strap-on…

If his orgasms are consistently controlled and severely restricted, he will eventually get to the point wherehe will do just about anything to cum. You’ll be amazed by what he’ll do for you…  Did I say putty in your hands?  Why Yes!   Tease, Tease, and violate him with your fantasies!

Erotica: Strap-ons.

We have always loved toys and this has been a nice surprise.  I started with anal play and progressed to strap-ons.  They have gotten larger and longer but my husband really enjoys.  I do too.

Ruined or prohibited orgasms.  

I control when he orgasms. Period.  If he violates, there are consequences. Typically, playful consequences, sometimes more chastity, but consequences.   The games we play here are, dildo gags, cock sheaths and in most cases this is exclusively for my pleasure but his always enjoys and importantly now, understands my pleasure.  He gets fewer and I get more and he is OK with pleasing.  He now understands me.

Torture: 

Hummmmm.  Seems like with increasing frequency and I am sure there is more around the corner.  We both like it!

Clean up

If he cums he also cleans it up.  For both of us this took getting used to, but now I see it more of a tool of reinforcement.

Friends: 

Yes, I have some friends that know, obviously not everyone, and occasionally they have joined.  

Worship:

Yes, he worships me.  It’s how he talks to me, it’s the respect around others, and it’s the non sexual rubs which he encourages.

Tease and Denial:

This is foundational.  I challenge and I flirt. This keeps him on his toes and obedient.  He knows I am his Queen and he knows I lovingly own him.  I dress to tease him to exploit our sensuality.

Sissification. 

We have played here a little, but it is very subtle.  I like my man in shape, well groomed, , well dressed, and tightly shaven.  No facial hair, little chest hair, and NO pubic hair.  Always locked.  I love him, but men are men.  We harness up his cock, and typically he wears a man thong which he likes.  Sometimes I make him put on my panties.  With a little liquid encouragement, he has worn my brassieres, and high heels at a party, but all in play.

Strapon !! Forced bisexual.  

Sometimes, YES, YES, YES!  Two cocks are always fun and you never know what is going to happen!!!!

Happy Fetish!